Thursday, October 17, 2013

On Overthinking...

Countless ideas have crossed through my mind and it seems that my tendency is to think, think over, think through, over think, and think some more. I can talk myself out of a lot of things or miss an opportunity by all this thinking.

Most of these ideas have to do with spontaneously blessing someone, dropping a treat on their doorstep, or along that vein. Why, oh why do I do this?!

It is Tuesday evening as I'm writing this and just after cleaning up dinner I detected a pink sky reflecting outside. I felt myself going down that over thinking road and knew if I delayed a moment or two more I'd probably miss my opportunity to see it.

I grabbed my camera, dashed to get shoes and tell David that Samuel and I were heading to the boat landing.

I am so glad I did not miss Samuel's exclamations over "how beautiful" everything was. He noticed the moon, the sky. As we rounded the corner he gasped at the grass which is the marsh grass and it was high tide so the water was all the way up in the grass and reflecting amazingly. I took a deep breath and should have pulled over to capture that beauty right that minute.

I am so glad I did not miss this. Popping into my head was the thought that God had painted the sky with a paintbrush - a friend said that recently and I thought it was such a beautiful thought. I'm so glad it came back tonight!

A few months ago, my friend, Kara invited friends to come celebrate with her as she finished radiation in May and I saw the bell she got to ring and have a picture of my sweet Daddy ringing that same bell in the same cancer center.

She said this,

"Consider yourself invited! I love you! Don’t question, don’t think, she surely wouldn’t want me there, WRONG! Come!"

I have not been able to shake these words over the past weeks. Because I am the one who thinks, the one who questions, the one who says she would not want me there or even more recently - they probably aren't even home or already have breakfast plans or I did not plan ahead enough.

I'm not making a promise I may or may not keep - but I would like to be more intentional about not over thinking but doing. Thankful for the first step tonight...