Thursday, August 23, 2012

The Hard Blessing


Things are settling into a routine around here - and God has been so gracious. The things He laid on my heart this summer have been put into place and we are reaping the benefits of slow day, unplugging the phone, staying home more and being much more firm about our schedule. I am more calm and peaceful and am truly getting more done.

And, while all of these things are a blessing - it strikes me that there is a hard side too. The side that has to say no to a friend again. To make the tough decisions - we're facing one right now which might include switching where the girls take dance all in the interest of reducing our time away from home. To know that I cannot please everyone. And, to know that many will misunderstand why I am doing things the way I am.

I know, I know - it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. The most important thing for me to do is be faithful to this calling God has given me. Right now - His call on this home is that we have three children that I stay home with whom we feel convicted to home educate. That alone is a serious calling that requires rigorous boundaries.

I'm learning that I have been too relaxed with some of these boundaries in the past and really paid for it. Stepping outside of these boundaries or relaxing them bears consequences - when I'm out of the house for two days straight, my kitchen instantly looks like this again:


When my kitchen looks like this, I am no longer a calm and peaceful feeling mama! I am walking through the lessons in learning how to do the hard things that are right for our family in order to reap the blessings that God is holding out to our home.

Psalm 16:6, "The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance."

Yes, inside the boundaries God has laid on my heart - there is peace, a pleasant knowing that I am walking in His ways, delight, multiplied time and a calm that only He can bring.

15 comments:

Leanne said...

Monica--
I so understand this post...
I am paying right now for a boundary I did not set! oh...and how I wish I could change it! I have a few more months to endure it! but, I've learned my lesson! my boys and hubby must come first! and I"m trying to figure that out in the season of extra busyness! I love the sign, by the way! I'm going to remember that next year when I'm a homeschooling mommy!
blessings:)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for being real!!! Have a great day!!

Char in NC said...

I completely understand where you are coming from. We have been there before. WE have had to "stand alone" many times over the years in order to do things God's way. It does bring much peace and comfort. Keep on even when you feel alone-He is always near.

Char in NC

Lauren (in Savannah) said...

I homeschool also and we attend a Christian co-op on Fridays. I feel the same as you when my house gets out of control my mind gets cluttered as well. A while back I came up with a new system of cleaning/decluttering a room a day. That way I would stay focused....

Blissful & Domestic said...

Monica I appreciate this post. I feel like we go through the same thing. It is hard to say no to friends and family sometimes, but your family has to come first. I think you are being such a great mommy. Homeschooling takes sacrifice sometimes. We homeschool too! Keep up the great work Monica.

Danielle @ Blissful and Domestic
Living a Frugal, Homemade, and Happy Life
www.blissfulanddomestic.com

Wendi said...

It is hard, but you are on the right path! I have trouble saying no and felt like I said it far to often this summer. With that said I know that my family and sanity must come first. To much time away from home leaves my home messy and me stressed.

Enjoy your day!

Ami said...

I'm agreeing with you today! I'm having a hard time not having my friends' (wonderful, easy, and great-influence) kids over at a time when the kids can have the best chance at a long playtime together, feeling bad about not attending our nearly perfect library homeschool program, and generally feeling begrudging anything that's taking me away from home, nesting, and resting right now (baby due in 4 weeks), then feeling guilty for being so inwardly focused! Oh, it's so hard to balance what God has called me to first, wanted to be God's love to those outside my home, and just being tempted by all this world's cool stuff!

Ami

Heather's Blog-o-rama said...

HI Monica,
I LOVE that you are staying obedient to what you feel God wants for your family!!! I think you definitely experience some blessing out of that !!!! You won't ever regret following God's lead, that's for sure ;) :) Love and hugs from the ocean shores of CAlifornia, Heather :)

Audrey said...

Love the post and the sign for the door! This is something I am trying to establish in my home, set boundaries. I feel like it is not fair to the kids if we do not have the time to do what we need to do because we are gone out of the house too much. I am taking time to evaluate what my schedule looks like and get it situated where we are doing what needs to get done rather than what we want to get done.

Dawn@OneFaithfulMom said...

This is right where I am now too. I am absolutely giddy over the fact that we have NO outside commitments during the weekdays this school year. YET. I hope that doesn't change, but if it does, it will be well thought through before we agree to it!

angie said...

The bonus is that your children are also learning self-control and self-discipline. That may be one of the most important lessons you teach them.

Anonymous said...

Amen, amen, amen! Having the time to focus on home and family and worship and quiet is so needed and such a blessing. We are all better for ourselves and for each other when we do this. Thank you for putting this into such beautiful words!

Amy in Texas

Patty said...

Yes, a very big yes to staying home.
I know for me, staying home means we are all more relaxed, our meals are better prepared (because I have more time to plan), and the house stays cleaner. Plus, staying home also gives us a less “rushed” feel to our days.

heather c said...

I'm definitely going to make one of these signs for our home! I find it daunting sometimes that some misunderstand that since we homeschool we must be free all the time to run errands or take visitors at the drop of the hat. Yes, thank you for the reminder that clear boundaries need to be set...again. ;-)

Brandy said...

Such a great post, Monica. A sweet friend of mine, encouraging me through processing how I need to be home, said, "It's not that we're only saying 'no.' Let us remember what we've said 'yes' to--which for me is a larger family (5 kids) and homeschooling."